Monday, December 08, 2014

Jennifer Rubin Wins Again!

As you know, the coveted "worst sentence ever published in the Washington Post" award has been bouncing back and forth between Jennifer Rubin and Richard Cohen for years now. The title is currently held by Rubin, but that doesn't mean she can't top herself! Regard this amazing sentence from her latest defense of Jeb Bush:

His remark last week concerning how he would have to run the presidential race if he jumped in and the reaction to it indicate how unhinged the far-right, shutdown squad sliver of the GOP electorate is than it is of his campaign vision. 

Would any of you like to volunteer to diagram that for me?

UPDATE: Twitter friend Hannah Draper gamely gave it a try:

(Click for bigger.)

I am amazed.

Monday, November 10, 2014

Tea Party Surrealism?

It's been a while since I've written for Wonkette, but I'm back asking the important questions: What if Joni Ernst were more like Max Ernst? Find out here.

UPDATE: BONUS GAG which I thought of in the shower this morning and then couldn't remember until twelve hours later:

  • June, 2019: Joni proposes swapping out the traditional GOP elephant logo for a minotaur.

Thursday, November 06, 2014

Tuesday, November 04, 2014

Ursula Plassnik Spotted!

(Photo: Die Standard)

FRESH! That's our beloved affable giantess just today at some thingy about how there should be more female politicians.

That's great (maybe not Joni Ernst, though)! But I mostly just think there should be more Ursula Plassnik.

Who Is The Next Sparkle Pony Superstar? Plus: Metablogging!

I wanted the Nauga to look like Nancy Reagan in those old photos from the 80s. Did I get the "worshipful gaze" right?

It should be obvious by now that Joni Ernst, who comes across as a barely intelligible found-object joke House candidate will, in fact, be the next SENATOR from Iowa.


So we're going to have SUPERCRAZY Joni for six whole years. I have a feeling she is going to be very, very entertaining. 

Now for the metablogging!

Sorry I haven't been posting much here lately. It's just a phase, honestly.

But if you simply aren't getting enough Pink Pony in your life, please do follow me on Twitter, because a lot of things in the past which would have been "hit and run" posts here are exactly the type of items that end up being tweets now instead. So "news photo with humorous sentence" posts are far more likely to end up there rather than here.

But Joni... oh, Joni! Those gigantic teeth show promise. Also: that wedge hairdo will make Photoshopping a dead cinch.

Thursday, October 23, 2014

Puppies To The Rescue?

Michael Steele's "I do SO love puppies" ad ran eight years ago when he was trying to become Maryland's next senator. The ads were widely praised as "highly effective" even after Steele lost "by a landslide" to "a complete nobody".

But, hey, eight years? That's long enough. Now it's Republican Martha McSally of Arizona's turn to use the puppy idea.

Congratulations go out to Ron Barber, her opponent.